Pussy Talk
or, How Journalism Works in the U.K.

The British papers were recently abuzz with the news that the United States had banned that subtle humor classic "Are You Being Served?" as too hot for TV. The Sun seems to have gotten the story first, on July 15, with the headline MRS SLOCOMBE'S PUSSY SHOCKS U.S.:

US TV bosses have banned Mrs Slocombe's pussy as too shocking for Americans.
The British sitcom Are You Being Served? faces being toned down or even axed because of the double entendre jokes.
Typical lines from the 30-year-old show set in a department store include Molly Sugden as Mrs Slocombe, below, saying: "It's a wonder I'm here at all. My pussy got soaking wet. I had to dry it out in front of the fire."
The moral clampdown follows Janet Jackson's nipple-revealing performance at the 2004 Superbowl.
Some viewers sued networks, claiming they were upset.
US Public Broadcasting Service exec Doug Myrland said: "We're worried. British sitcoms are problematic--they thrive on double entendre."

This was followed by an item in the seemingly more respectable London Times three days later:
Mrs Slocombe's pussy--one of the unseen stars of the BBC sitcom Are You Being Served?--faces a ban from US television as it is too saucy. American broadcasters have been sensitive to criticism of their moral standards after Janet Jackson revealed her nipple during this year's Super Bowl. They fear viewers could sue over lines from Mrs Slocombe, such as: "It's a wonder I'm here at all. My pussy got soaking wet and I had to dry it out in front of the fire."
Public Broadcasting Service spokesman Doug Myrland said: "British sitcoms are problematic. They thrive on double entendre."

Well, this all seemed a bit, er, fishy to us, given the years we've spent asking "Are you free?" in front of our all-too-American televisions. A little digging revealed the source of this "scoop": a July 13 Christian Science Monitor article about, yes, potential editing of British programs on certain PBS affiliates. Nowhere does it mention AYBS, Mrs. Slocombe, or the aforementioned pussy. And this PBS "exec"-cum-"spokesman" Doug Myrland? He's the station manager at the San Diego public TV station.

His actual quote in the CSM, regarding the Brit-coms shown on his affiliate:
"They thrive on double entendre, and we're saying, 'Do we have to do something with those?' " Mr. Myrland asks. "We're worried that we're maybe on thin ice.' "

Not as thin, perhaps, as the editorial walls between Rupert Murdoch's English newspapers.