A caplet of Guinness and scent of crisps, please

When will Diageo, the multinational drinks conglomerate which owns Guinness, finally have gone too far? We always thought that day would come when they decide to close the St James Gate Brewery in Dublin, as is sometimes rumoured. But it may already here. We at first ignored this story, because it was one of those "politician opens factory" stories that are a staple of Irish news coverage, where all politics really is local. But upon further investigation:

The new state-of-the-art plant, which is supported by Enterprise Ireland, has commenced production of the 'essence of Guinness' at the riverside site on Mary Street [Waterford], where brewing has been taking place for more than 200 years.

The essence, which is known as the special ingredient for the drink, will be exported to each of the 50 countries where Guinness is brewed.

What all this actually means is rather opaque -- in fact as dark as the precious nectar itself. We suppose it means that Diageo has decided that there is one ingredient that makes Guinness specific and they want to centralise production in one place. But once the corporate suits get hold of the idea that there really is an essence of Guinness, why bother brewing entire vats at all? Pills, perfumes, cologne -- surely cheaper and more space saving than those kegs and pints. Or perhaps we should consider corporate conspiracy theories at their worst; maybe there is no special ingredient at all, and it's just a marketing scam to make globalised Guinness seem more Irish. As the lads in the American Guinness ads say, Brilliant!